Can You Outgrow a Friend?

 Hello!

Have you ever had a best friend that you just grew apart from? Basically I have this friend who I've known for my whole life and she has always been really close to me. We've been through a lot together, but recently, it's like I don't know who she is. She has changed and I know that as a teen, you change but I thought old friendships didn't change. This probably sounds really stupid but I feel like every time I talk to her, I feel less and less like myself. Sometimes I feel like a complete stranger to her. At times, it feels like it's back to normal and that nothing has changed but to get there, I feel as though I have to break down barriers. I have this constant feeling that I always have to be on her side and be there for her when I know that it wouldn't happen the other way. 

I feel like I can't just throw away fourteen years of friendship just like that but whenever I'm with her I constantly feel like I have to prove myself to her. I have better friends who will always be there for me no matter what and I know that I'll always be there for them. I have this constant feeling that I should just let her go and let her move on (and part of me wants to do that as well) but always give her another chance. She's constantly letting me down as a friend and she's hurt me too much for me to forgive her but the trouble is, is that I don't think she knows what she's doing.

 Whenever I want to move on, I remember the times when we were younger and we used to be inseparable. She has a new group of friends that constantly make me feel insignificant. Something that has been there for your entire life is harder than I think to let go of. Like your favourite childhood toy; you just don't want to let go of it. That is what it feels like..

I think I've come to the conclusion that I'm done. I'm done with pretending to be her friend when I hate being with her. I know through school that I'll always be in her life, but that doesn't mean that I have to spend my time with her. I want to spend time with people who make me feel good about myself.

Have you ever had a friend that you have moved on from??

TG xxx